“You’re not dressed!” Amanda exclaimed as she pushed past Tristan in a large afro, bell bottoms, a neon purple off the shoulder top, at least 2 dozen jelly bracelets of numerous colors, a large red hair bow and pink LA Gear high tops with bright green and blue laces. She was wearing at least six pair of earrings and a Michael Jackson rhinestone glove. She had on bright blue eye shadow with jet black eyeliner rimming her eyes and out to her temples. Her lashes were heavy with mascara, her lips were bright enough to land a plane and upon closer inspection, she had a Madonna mole. She also wore multi colored glitter all over, Ray-Bans and bright pink sweater tied around her waist.
“Do I want to know why you are dressed like that?”
“I told you I was taking you to a party. Didn’t I say it was a late twenty’s retro party?”
“I wasn’t sure what you meant, I’m still not sure.”
“Don’t you like my outfit?”
“What is it?”
“It’s late 20th century.”
“Oh, it is?”
“Isn’t it?”
“Well, technically, I guess. It’s part early 70’s part mid 80’s. My mom had those shoes.”
“Well, I tried. It is late 20’s. Didn’t any of your stuff survive?”
A container of his belongings had been delivered a few days after he had moved to Shambhala. His mother had put some his favorite things in a box that had been kept in his company’s headquarters with instructions to get them to him upon his return. His favorite Yankee’s baseball hat, 501 button fly and his tee shirt collection greeted him as he opened the plastic tub. With a little prodding from Amanda, he quickly lapsed into his old style. He fondly reminisced about each small tear, mark and impression in the denim. He chose an ‘I killed Kenny’ South Park tee shirt and Sketcher tennis shoes.
Within a few minutes, Amanda and Tristan were quickly walking the ten blocks to the party. The Bangles were blaring from the windows above the street. A guy in powder blue tails was rushing in with a girl dressed Molly Ringwald from ‘Pretty in Pink’ in numerous layers and carrying a Cabbage Patch Doll.
The flat looked like Studio 54. A giant disco ball hung from the ceiling three floors up. A vid projector on a far wall showed flashes from The Breakfast Club, Hair, ET, Alien, Star Wars, Rollerball and just about every other movie from the 70’s and 80’s. A second vid screen played the music videos from Jimmy Hendrix to Michael Jackson. As service droids passed drinks in Michael Jackson’s Thriller jacket
A girl dashed towards them in Princess Diana’s wedding dress with two service droids rushing behind, bearing the massive train.
“Boy, Prince Charles would have loved to have those two to help that day.”
“So Amanda, this is your popsicle? Oh he is delish.”
“Nadia, this is Tristan. Tristan, this is our hostess, Nadia.”
“So what do you think of the décor?”
“Very unique. Steve Rubel would have been impressed.”
“The other room is like Miami Vice if that’s more your speed.”
“Yes, I noticed Don Johnson seems quite popular tonight.”
As he had looked around the room, he had seen several guys in pastel tee shirts and white blazers. Shoulders pads, mini skirts and bell bottoms danced with Charlie’s Angel wantabes, including a dead ringer for the Farrah Fawcett poster. Tristan was able to contain himself until he saw Mork. When the dead wringer was dancing with Conan’s Grace Jones Tristan lost it. Trying not to be rude, he asked Amanda to dance.
They moved to the dance floor only to have the crowd part for a couple of Billy Idol-looking guys to erupt into break dancing. When a white Mr. T and a JR Ewing joined in, it was too much to take. Tristan grabbed Amanda and headed for what he was the safety of the balcony. Unfortunately Jerry Garcia was making out with Alexis Carrington. Trying to find a safe haven, the stumbled into a room Tristan could handle. A guy in Rocky Balboa trunks was playing Pac-Man. Tron, pinball, Joust and Galaga were equally attended by the cast of 21 Jump Street and Woodstock. In another corner, a gaggle of beautiful young women were playing Trivial Pursuit while a handful of guys were working a Rubik’s Cube.
“I take it that the 80’s are the popular era for your group?”
“I’m a 40’s girl myself. Do you want to play Pac-Man? I heard its fun.”
“I’ll pass. I can’t get over this music. My mom listened to this stuff when she cleaned or wanted to dance with my dad.”
A ‘Like a Virgin’ replica approached Tristan carrying a Rainbow Bright doll and toying seductively with a Tootsie Pop.
“I’ve never seen you before. I’m Safora. You are?”
“Tristan.”
“Well, Tristan, it is a pleasure to meet you. Your outfit is subtle. Where’d you get it?”
Unsure she recognized him, he decided to maintain his anonymity.
“I just found it in a box.”
“Tristan, I like to dance. Will you dance with me?”
Tristan paused and glanced terrified at Amanda.
“I’ve flattered, but I’m here with someone.”
“Don’t be silly Tristan,” chimed Amanda, “dance with Safora. I don’t mind. Go.”
Before he could protest further, she pop her candy in her mouth and her white lace gloved hand reached out and snared his wrist to drag him back to the dance room. They made their way to the dancing crowd. Saturday Night Fever John Travolta was dancing with Stevie Nicks. An American Gladiator was dancing with Laura Ingles while Pee Wee Herman was doing the cha cha with Smurfette. ‘Hungry Eyes’ began as Tristan put his hands on her waist. They swayed with Rainbow Bright on the back of his neck.
“You smell really nice Tristan.”
“Thank you. You look great. I’ve seen the video. You nailed it.”
“Nailed?”
“You got it correct.”
“Oh, thanks. You know a lot about the late 20th?”
“You could say that. Very early 21st too.”
“I like a man who knows his history. You must have done well in school.”
The Cutting Crew’s ‘I Just Died’ began. Safora snuggled down in the curve of Tristan’s neck as she wrapped her arms around his waist. Moments into the song Safora began to delicately trace his spine with her fingertips. She looked up at him, left his spine for the back of his head and kissed him. Tristan froze.
“What’s wrong Tristan?”
“You kissed me.”
“Yes, I did. Why?”
“That’s my question. Why did you do that?”
“Why did I kiss you? I want to have sex with you, what do you think?”
Tristan stood as a rabbit in the headlights. Being with Rayn was one thing, and even Amanda had potential, but Tristan could not imagine having sex with someone he didn’t even know their last name.
“I’m sorry, did you say you wanted to have sex with me? We just met.”
“Yeah, I was there. Is there something wrong?”
“You don’t know me. You know nothing about me. Yet you want to lingoni?”
“I never said anything about lingoni. I just want to have sex. You don’t find me attractive? I don’t stimulate you?”
“You can’t be serious.”
“Tristan, you’re beginning to freak me out a little. I don’t understand.”
“You don’t realize who I am?”
“Yeah, you’re Tristan, Amanda’s friend.”
“Do you often have sex with virtual strangers?”
“That’s what sex is for. Besides, you’re not a stranger. Are you from another planet or something?”
Tristan desperately scoured the room for Amanda. He was in the Twilight Zone. Much to his horror, he found her in the arms of a Captain Kirk.
“Oh, Tristan, there you are. This is my friend Mark, Mark this is Tristan, the guy I was telling you about.”
Tristan barely noticed the heavy handshake as he stared, perplexed, at Amanda. Taking her by the arm to a relatively quiet corner under a giant Led Zepplin wall hanging, Tristan demanded an explanation.
“You bring me to this party, hand me off to some crazy nympho and sneak off to make out with some other guy? What the hell.”
“I’m not sneaking. We were going to have sex after I found you to make sure you were okay.”
“So you admit it. That’s refreshing.”
“What are you getting so bent out of shape about? I’ll have sex with you too, if you want. Aren’t you going to have sex with Safora first?”
“Are you kidding?”
“I’m guessing that you and Majyp Rayn have not discussed the difference between sex and lingoni?”
“Yeah. She said lingoni was more spiritual. We had a Tab A, Slot B conversation.”
“So what’s the problem? You’ll have sex with Safora. I’ll have sex with Mark. Then you and I can have sex if you want.”
“I think you guys are taking this free love stuff way too far.”
“Free love?”
“The 70’s mentality of uninhibited sex with numerous partners.”
“This party’s theme has nothing to do with sex. People have sex at parties. They eat and drink and dance and have sex. I’m sorry if you didn’t understand this. I would never have asked you if I had known you don’t have sex.”
“Rayn and I just started.”
“Lingoni and sex are two different things, remember?”
“I think I want to go. I can find my own way Amanda. Thank Nadia for me.” Tristan rushed out of the flat, very frustrated and very confused.